Got Regrets?

Have you ever been laying in bed at night, sitting in your office, driving down the road and have something that you said or did come back to your memory? I have worked with many patients in the past that after receiving the news of their diagnosis, they begin to think about the past more so than the future. They begin discussing with their family, friends, social worker, chaplain and the entire caregiving team about their “regrets.” What are regrets? Wikipedia defines a regret as:

a negative conscious and emotional reaction to personal past acts and behaviors. Regret is often expressed by the term “sorry.” Regret is often a feeling of sadness, shame, embarrassment, depression, annoyance or guilt, after one acts in a manner and later wishes not to have done so. Regret is distinct from guilt, which is a deeply emotional form of regret — one which may be difficult to comprehend in an objective or conceptual way. In this regard, the concept of regret is subordinate to guilt in terms of its emotional intensity.

Regret can describe not only the dislike for an action that has been committed, but also, importantly, regret of inaction. Many people find themselves wishing that they had done something in a past situation.

Why do these feelings come up? They are in the past. So why begin your future, and the time you have left, rehashing your regrets?

Is it possible that by bringing these regrets back that the future can change?

It absolutely can change your future!!! I have witnessed tiny miracles that the words, “I’m sorry” or “forgive me” have created. Just because our lives are limited and we might not have the days left in them, does not mean that we cannot change our outlook and our future. Think about this, think about your past for a moment, do you have any regrets? What would you say as your “final piece?” The burdens that we all carry can be large and some of the most difficult things to say can only be two little words….can you create a better future? Our team of experts dealing with end of life issues can help bring about those difficult conversations and make the future better.


About merianmilton

I am a mother of two beautiful girls and my husband and I live in Marianna, FL. I am the Eastern Region Director of Marketing for Covenant Hospice and absolutely love spreading the word about the excellent services of Covenant Hospice and taking care of patients and their families facing a life limiting illness.

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